The Untold Price of Foreign Dreams: Parents Left Behind in India.

 

https://www.yodda.care/

The untold price of Indian migration lies in the silent suffering of parents left behind as sons and daughters chase foreign dreams. As India celebrates record-breaking numbers in global education and migration, hearts are quietly breaking in empty homes across the country. This evocative blog explores the realities faced by millions of Indian parents: their sacrifices, loneliness, and hopes for reconnection.

Introduction.

When young Indians leave for foreign shores, stories in the news focus on opportunities, achievements, and global success. Yet, left behind are the very people who raised these achievers—the mothers and fathers who watch their homes grow quieter, and whose lives slowly shrink as children find new roots abroad. Beneath the glitter of foreign dreams, there lies an untold price—one measured in loneliness, longing, and loss.

The Scale of Indian Migration.

India boasts the world’s largest diaspora, with over 18.5 million Indians living abroad as of 2024—a number that has tripled since 1990 and now makes up 6% of all global migrants. In just the last five years, more than 3 million Indian students left for higher education overseas. Top destinations include the USA, Canada, the UK, Germany, Australia, and the Gulf countries.

The Parents Left Behind.

Each migration story often begins with parents sacrificing their savings, selling property, and taking loans just to ensure a brighter future for their children overseas. In the beginning, everyone celebrates: relatives praise the parents, while families exchange visits and gifts. But then, as visits become rare and calls less frequent, only silence and longing remain for the parents in India.

Emotional Struggles: Loneliness and Anxiety.

Many Indian parents, especially the elderly, experience extreme loneliness once their children settle abroad. Psychiatrists report a rise in "loneliness syndrome," anxiety, and depression among such parents. Loved ones may live thousands of miles away, but the pain of daily absence is felt most at mealtimes, on festivals, and during moments of illness or weakness.

Medical professionals warn about:

• Decreased self-esteem and rising feelings of isolation.
• Loss of interest in activities, hobbies, and socializing.
• Greater risk of depression and, in some cases, suicidal thoughts.

The Physical Toll on Parents’ Health.

It is not just the heart that aches. Multiple studies have shown that older parents left behind by emigrant children suffer more health issues. They often struggle with:

• Self-care challenges, like managing medicines or daily chores.
• Increased mobility issues, since there is nobody to help.
• Less communication and face-to-face interaction with family.

Most Indian families once depended on sons and daughters for care and support in old age—but today, nearly 69% of elderly in some Indian states have at least one child settled elsewhere.

Festivals: A Time of Joy Or Pain?

Imagine Diwali without family, or Holi when no one visits. For many parents, festival seasons deepen the ache. Now, what was once a lively house is often empty. The phone rings occasionally, but the warmth of physical company, laughter, and old rituals is missing.

Social Stigma and the Changing Joint Family.

The Indian joint family is shrinking. As nuclear families replace old traditions, parents left behind may also feel social stigma—not just for being alone, but for relying on servants or distant relatives in emergencies. Many aging parents struggle to ask neighbors or friends for help, fearing pity or gossip.

Financial Remittances: A Silver Lining?

One positive outcome is remittances—the money that emigrant children send back, which helps families improve their standard of living. Remittance funds are often directed toward better healthcare and property. But money cannot substitute the emotional comfort that only a close, loving presence can offer.

Stories That Break the Heart.

Take the case of Mrs. Menon from Kerala. She beams with pride when talking about her son, a successful software engineer in Canada, yet her voice cracks describing her days—spent mostly in silence, meals in front of the TV, and yearning for the grandkids she has barely met. There are thousands like her: parents whose sacrifices enabled their children to soar, but whose own world has grown smaller and lonelier.

Facts and Figures.

• Over 18.5 million Indians live abroad (2024 UN report).
• More than 3 million students went abroad for study between 2020-2024.
• 69% of elderly in Tamil Nadu had at least one child settled away, many overseas.
• 13% of Indian children had a migrant father in 2011-12; this figure is higher now.
• India has the world’s largest emigrant population, accounting for 6% of all international migrants.

How Parents Try to Cope?

Some parents fill their days with social work, religious activities, or new hobbies. Video calls bring faces closer, if not the warmth. Support groups for NRI parents are growing. Doctors advise routines, self-care, and regular communication with children. Still, for many, these are only Band-Aids over deeper wounds.

Why Children Leave?

The push for migration comes from:

• Better jobs and income abroad.
• Quality education and global exposure.
• Limited opportunities in Indian towns and cities.
• Aspirations for a safe, secure, and comfortable life.

Both children and parents believe migration is the path to happiness, security, and social respect. The irony is that, often, happiness is traded for “success.”

The Paradox of Pride and Pain.

Society applauds families with NRI children, seeing their foreign address as a badge of honor. Yet, only those living the reality know that this recognition comes with a toll—the untold price of separation, missed milestones, and emotional emptiness.

Can Technology Fill the Gap?

With WhatsApp, Skype, and Zoom, virtual bonds can be maintained. But screens cannot replace the embrace of a child or the joy of shared family meals. As medical emergencies and everyday needs arise, the distance feels limitless.

Looking Ahead.

• Is there hope? The Indian government and social groups are trying to help through:
• Local events and community support for senior citizens.
• Policies to encourage “reverse brain drain” and NRI investments at home.
• Programs to help parents visit children abroad (when feasible).

But the most profound solution remains rebuilding connections—encouraging children to include parents in their new lives, or to return to care for them, even temporarily.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ).

1. How many Indians live abroad today?

As of 2024, more than 18.5 million Indians live outside the country, making India the largest source of emigrants worldwide.

2. What is the impact on parents left behind in India?

Many parents face serious mental, emotional, and physical health concerns—ranging from loneliness and depression to mobility challenges and social isolation.

3. Why do so many Indians migrate?

The main reasons are better educational opportunities, jobs, and living standards, especially in countries like the USA, Canada, and the UK.

4. Do parents benefit financially from their children’s migration?

Many receive money (remittances) that improves their living conditions, but often feel that emotional loss outweighs financial gain.

5. What can parents do to cope with being left behind?

Staying connected through regular calls, joining support groups, engaging in hobbies, and maintaining routines can help. Community centers and professional support are also beneficial.

6. Are there any government policies for supporting NRI parents?

Several welfare programs exist for the elderly, but targeted support for parents of NRI children is still evolving.

7. What role can children play from abroad?

Frequent, meaningful communication, annual visits, supporting parental health needs financially and emotionally, and involving parents in major life events from afar can ease the pain.

8. Has the trend of migration increased in recent years?

Yes, student and work-based migration from India has surged, with more than 3 million students leaving between 2020-2024 alone.

9. What percentage of Indian elderly have children settled abroad?

In some regions, such as Tamil Nadu, up to 69% of elderly have at least one child living far away, often overseas.

10. Is parental loneliness publicly discussed in India?

The subject is gaining visibility, with more discussions in the media and support from mental health professionals, but stigma and silence remain widespread.